First time on a Fixie - SF - and a Revelation

Another random Tuesday off.  It's a beautiful day in SF and I couldn't pass up a chance to take my new fixie out for a ride.  The Giants play in game 6 today and I can't wait.  Yes I am a bandwagoner and proud of it!  I took Embarcadero all the way down to Ghirardelli Square and it was so amazing.  Never did I imagine in a million years I would be able to go out and ride a bike on my own.  Seem childish I know, but I'm sort of an OCD freak.  I think way too much; what if I get a flat tire?, do I look weird on this bike?, what if I fall off in front of a bunch of people?.  It's a demon that I'm trying to conquer.

After a nice bike ride I had another hour on the meter so I went to my favorite cafe Crossroads and had some time with Jesus.  For some reason I was overwhelmed with tears.  I came to a conclusion there is a reason why I can't fully experience the salvation God has given me.  For all my life I have been 'Miss Independent'.   I am learning how to depend on my savior and 'go with the flow'.  I can't know everything, or plan everything out.  What I need to do is open myself up for failure and allow God to make the appropriate changes in my life.  Straight up no chase.